I've been meaning to write a post for a number of months now on a favorite
soapbox topic of mine - Education Reform and the Role of the Parent.
When I first set out to try and 'right' perceived wrongs perpetrated on
decent taxpaying citizens and parents through the public school system, I
thought I was going to make quick headway. I thought, if I talked long
and hard enough (I guess), I could make people see how easily and simply all
today's educational issues could be solved by moving education back to the
local level. Who, after all, more than a parent would want to see their
student thrive in their education?
I have been wrong about myriad things in my life, but about fewer things
have I been more wrong.
I remember one of the first times I discussed a bill with a legislator and
said something akin to, "Parents don't want that.", and I was told,
"Parents don't know what they want."
I've also been told, "Too many parents out there today are doing a
terrible job - someone has to take care of those kids." "We all
talk about local control - but local school boards are doing a terrible
job."
There was even a legislator this session who wanted to make ALL home
schoolers provide their lesson plans and curricula to the state because she
knew A family who was 'home schooling' their children because
they couldn't manage to get the kids to school on time due to the fact that
their crack habit created somewhat irregular hours.
There is an old Chinese proverb that says, "If you give a man a fish,
he'll eat for a day. If you TEACH a man to fish, he'll eat for a
lifetime."
Sadly, we have no idea how in the world to decipher this proverb anymore
because humans have finally come to the point in history where legislation is
written at EVERY level about EVERYTHING to protect EVERYONE from THEMSELVES.
No, there are no responsible home schoolers out there home schooling because
there is ONE that isn't. No, there are no school boards out there doing
the right thing because there are a number that AREN'T.
We don't write legislation, regulations and mandates TO PROTECT THE PEOPLE
doing the right thing in society anymore, we create laws to try and force those
that aren't into doing so. This ideology exists in direct opposition to
that of the Constitution and the Founders' vision of our Republic.
According to the Founders, government wasn't instituted among men to protect
men from THEMSELVES, but to protect THEM from the government (over-regulation).
Yes, I feel that MANY parents today (maybe even a majority) have abandoned
their children on a number of levels (emotionally, physically, economically,
behaviorally).
I know good Christian parents who just can't bear to be honest with their
children and reproach them for bad behavior because "We must speak
life" into our children and "shaming or confronting" them will
only make them feel worse about themselves. They 'helicopter' around
their children's activities and schools because they never want to be out of
the picture, but their eyes remain blissfully closed to anything other than
perfection.
I know parents who need to have a house in Oak Tree but can only afford it
on two incomes so they drop their kids off at school in the morning, allow them
to let themselves into the house after school and remain unsupervised until
they come home from work, pick them up and then cart them to 20 or 30 after
school activities because they feel guilty about not spending time with them.
I know parents who have been left by a spouse (or whose other half is serving
overseas in the military) and are having to be two people all the time and are
simply too worn out to do as much as they'd like and as much as their children
need.
I know parents who simply don't care a whit about their kids excepting the
gubbmt check they get to feed and clothe them.
But let's "what if" a minute....
What if there weren't gubbmt checks to provide a 'safety net' for those who
simply don't know how to survive because they've been getting a gubbmt check
all their lives?
What if, instead of in-house suspension, a parent had to come up to the
school and babysit their own misbehaving child, or be forced to take them to
work with them?
What if a child was humanely and calmly given a swat with a paddle on their
back end when they created an issue in the classroom that prevented others from
learning? (I had a NUMBER of those and I turned out okay with no lasting
emotional or physical scars!)
What if churches actually taught Biblical parenting, accountability and
responsibility from their pews instead of the "speaking life" to
"prosperity" gospel?
What if principals backed up teachers and told parents they had better make
their kid tow the line or they'd get tossed into the street?
.....What if the federal, state and local governments, schools and
districts, weren't providing a MYRIAD of ways for parents to avoid having to
take personal responsibility for their kids?
.....What if the federal and state government stayed out of the mechanics of
education entirely and schools and districts simply gave parents no choice but
to have the responsibility for their children they should have assumed once
they gave birth to them?
Yes, unfortunately for all of society, Leave It To Beaver is basically only
a television show providing a glimpse of what family used to be and may never
be again here in America as American values and morals drift further and
further outside the scope of those of the '50's.
That doesn't negate the fact that, today, the education establishment, and
government at all levels, take power away from parents on a long term and DAILY
basis, only to then attack them for not doing 'enough'.
Guess what? Prophesies are often self-fulfilling and your straw man is
on fire.
Only parents can truly know what’s best for each of their individual children and only parents have the vested interest necessary to raise children with the education each will need to become productive Oklahomans and Americans. Every child has the right to an education best suited to them, and every parent has the right – and duty – to provide such an education. ROPE 2.0 seeks to help equip parents with the information necessary to best champion their child’s educational needs.
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As a teacher in a low income school, I would love for parents to have the responsibility for their children's behavior (and learning) in school. But what I see for most of the parents who are neglecting their children, is that they are raising their children the way they were raised. Many times the neglect is generational. I don't have a good answer.
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